Off the Deep End… Part 2
I jumped. I’ll admit, it wasn’t a full on courageous jump, as if I were really going to walk on water with Jesus. It was more of a half-hearted, Jesus can always pull me up if I start to drown like usual jump. But I jumped none the less.
Just days before, it seemed as if God told us NOT to look for a new place to live yet, in spite of our looming move out date. I confess, I tried to figure out the why to God's WAIT.
Great. One of us is going to die. That’s it. That’s why we aren’t looking because one of us is going to die, and so we won’t need a place to live because we will need the money for funeral expenses.
Yep. That’s how I roll. Ask my husband how much fun it is to live with someone who thinks like that.
I also confess that even though God said WAIT, I was peeking. Just like a kid at Christmas. I mean, come ON. How do you stare at the gift in front of you and NOT peek? I was still going online, looking at homes for rent and homes to buy, hoping God was too busy with the war in the middle East to notice my cheating.
Three days into “waiting,” I received an email from a friend. She asked if I had any interest in a teaching position at her school. The school my middle son attends.
Odd. Odd because I had already told them “no” in the past. My intent for Fall 2014 was to stay home and write my head off full time. But the email tormented me. Because I WAS interested in the teaching position.
I went to prayer group that night and told the women about it. How I was hell bent on hearing God and not missing His miracle for a home for us, and why did THIS get thrown in the mix NOW? I was kind of busy worrying about a home, here. Who has time to think about going back to work?
I’d been grasping at straws for several weeks trying to figure this house thing out, acting like Old Testament Sarah, taking control of my situation instead of waiting on God. But, I did NOT want to miss His miracle by 5 minutes. I did NOT want to screw this thing up by grabbing the first straw.
“What if you just keep walking through the door?” my prayer group asked.
“But what if it’s the wrong door?” I remarked.
And then someone threw Scripture at me:
Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
don’t try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
he’s the one who will keep you on track.
Don’t assume that you know it all. (MSG Ps. 3:5-6)
Usually I would punch them. Except they were right.
So we prayed. And I went to meet with my friend the next morning. You know, just to chat. Have a casual conversation about the job. And I would trust God to keep me on track.
I walked into her office armed with questions and concerns, and with my resume and application in hand. You know, just in case.
It was supposed to be a 30 minute conversation. Me asking questions, her answering. Me telling all my concerns and why this job might not work, and her agreeing. Me trying to convince her NOT to consider me for the job. It didn’t go that way.
Yes, we talked… for over an hour. As she said things like, “These classes are honors WRITING classes you will teach. And speech…”
Right. Of course they are. Because I’m a writer. And a speaker. And this is my year to focus on writing. And speaking. Sigh. My friend says, “Why don’t we just go over and schedule a formal interview for later this week?”
Walk through the door. God will keep me on track. “Sure, why not?”
The superintendent was in her office however, and interviewed me on the spot. I barely had combed my hair that morning and maybe brushed my teeth. Those 2 reasons alone should have halted the entire process. But I walked out 2 hours later with a job offer and wondered, Did that just really happen?
And as the week progressed, God’s plan continued to unfold…stay tuned.
Lay your head down tonight
Take a rest from the fight
Don’t try to figure it out
Just listen to what I’m whispering to your heart
‘Cause I know this is not
Anything like you thought
The story of your life was gonna be
And it feels like the end has started closing in on you
But it’s just not true
There’s so much of the story that’s still yet to unfold